The Writer's Voice Contest Entry: NORTHERN NIMSBY VS. THE DRONES

 Query:

My novel, Northern Nimsby vs. the Drones is a 65,000 word cozy mystery.

After Jordan Nimsby’s perfect fiancée is murdered, her life enters a downward spiral until she hits rock bottom in her hometown of Eagle River, Wisconsin. Most people wouldn’t look at an explosion on the first day of a new job as the light at the end of the tunnel, but for Jordy, it means returning to a childhood passion: solving mysteries.

Living in a dusty cabin next door to her parents, working for an old rival and lusting after a high school crush, Jordy welcomes danger during her orientation at the Coffee Cravin’ Cabin.  Drawn by her inner detective, she dives headfirst into the bombing investigation- and right back to her high school BFF and resident rebel, Samantha Orwitz, who is now working as the lead detective for the local police department. The two combine their witty sarcasm and rambunctious personalities as they follow the clues from a series of unmanned drone attacks in nearby towns. The women chase an array of questionable characters and stalk down clues that lead from political conventions to creepy isolated cabins as they seek to unveil who is bringing destruction to the Northwood’s and why.  Leaving behind chaos and general mayhem, as well as the occasional cold brew and deep fried cheese curd, they become determined to survive the mystery without getting blown to bits themselves.

Northern Nimsby vs. the Drones has the potential to evolve into a series, and I have additional outlines in the works. I think the cozy mystery genre needs an adventurous Wisconsin gal with an offbeat personality and a hearty dose of spunk- Jordy is that girl! Previously, the majority of my published work has been freelance or for campus publications at the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse; this is my first novel. Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Sarah David

First 250 words:

I screamed when the eight-legged monster jumped from the shelf above the oven, missing my head by inches and my scrambled eggs by less. Fortunately, I quickly recovered and beat the spider to a pulp with my trusty old hiking boot. I shoved the tawny boot back in its place near the door before returning to the stove top and giving the eggs another poke with the spatula. One more joy of living in my parents’ sparsely insulated log cabin: bugs around every corner and crevice, preparing for attack. I was at least 72% certain that these creatures had a personal vendetta against me from day one, and their battle tactics seriously surpassed my own. For two weeks now it has been me (Jordan Nimsby) vs. the Evil Bug Bastards (or EBBs for short).

            Yes, that’s correct; my parents gave me an androgynous name. When I was about four or five, prancing around in princess costumes, it was a BIG deal; I wanted my name to be Anastasia or Katherine. Since those days, I’ve grown to love it. My friends used to call me “Nimsby” or “Nims” in high school; now, however, most of them call me Jordy, partially after one of THE best wide receivers in the NFL. Seriously, don’t interrupt a Packer game unless you’re bringing fresh cheese curds or kolatchze to share. You may laugh, but we don’t jest about our football, cheese and European baked goods here in Northern Wisconsin. Or our beer, for that matter…

The Irresponsibility Problem

As a teacher, I feel that I often get a glimpse into some of the darker problems of our society. I'm sure this is also a common occurrence if you are employed in, say, the medical field or law enforcement. In fact, probably any job allows you to see the bad sides to people (I can think of a few gruesome incidents when I was employed as a housekeeper over the years...for more on that, you can check out my old blog here: http://housekeepersrant-sarah.blogspot.com/) along with the good. With teaching, you certainly see different things than with housekeeping (and for that I must say, thank God!), but the problems you witness can be upsetting just the same.
Over the years, teachers have seen their fair share of Huckleberry Finns and Tom Sawyers, so being a slacker is certainly not a recent devolution. Still, it's rough when you find students who sport a complete and utter lack of motivation. Of course, this isn't necessarily a large percentage of my students, but it does seem larger than it should be. I will also add that this is one of the first generations that have parents who see slackerdom as acceptable behavior. Take a look at 1960's classic television. When the kids mess up, the parents lecture, educate, and/or swat the troublemakers. The kids realize they need to get their act together, and things go back to normal. What do we see on television nowadays? Besides a ridiculous amount of risque behavior, we see everyone, from kids to the elderly, behaving badly and getting away with it, even being applauded for it! This sort of "applaud the evildoer" mentality is not only a common occurrence in sitcoms nowadays, but also in reality TV and even the news! It's terrifying, quite frankly, but I digress...


Now, I don't think that our society is doomed or that modern television is evil. I do, however, believe that a good chunk of our society has in fact hit rock bottom, and, for whatever reason, they don't realize it. Or maybe they just don't care. From a teacher standpoint, these are the kids who come to school without a clue. They haven't done their homework, they text and chat all through class, and they make snide remarks to everybody and anybody. Their hobbies include playing video games for hours straight, posting a zillion selfies on Instagram and Facebook, or (even worse) getting involved in drugs/alcohol/other stupid stuff. No, I didn't have my life planned out by high school, and I certainly wasn't perfect, but I at least had some semblance of an idea that I wanted to have opportunities and be successful later on. That meant I was working (and, sure, occasionally playing) hard- studying hard, working an after school/weekend job, participating in school sports and activities, being active with my friends and family, being outdoors, and basically enjoying life. I ask some of these kids what they want to do after high school and the answers make me want to yank out my hair: "I'll just live at home, my parents don't care", "I'll probably, you know, play video games, hang out, whatever", "I'll stick with my job at McDonald's; all my friends work there", and a common one, even for my seniors: "I don't know- what does it matter?" What does it matter, indeed?
Where is this attitude coming from, and why is it becoming more and more acceptable? It's not just the kids; their parents are to blame, too. I'd prefer not to disclose the times I've heard parents telling their kids (or insinuating) that school doesn't matter. Some of these are the people that I see aimlessly wandering Wal-Mart at 2pm on a Tuesday wearing their pajamas. What do these people do? And what message are they sending their children? The saddest part about this situation is that we live in a truly incredible and fortunate nation, where people with motivation and solid work ethics can accomplish really amazing feats, regardless of the difficulties they face. Success isn't guaranteed, but the chance to work hard and try your best is free for the taking (which can't be said of every place around the globe). Unfortunately, these kids, without the right encouragement, might not ever realize their true potential or even the fact that they have one. It's depressing.

That's why I am constantly encouraging my students, and the ones who come from rougher situations need this encouragement even more. And when the parents shrug off a meeting, a deadline, and due date, telling their kids that it's okay to do the same, I come back with, "No, actually, it's not, because you need to be prepared for the future. Jobs have deadlines and requirements, and this is your foundation." Everyone comes with a backstory- some lives are tougher than others; it's just the hard, honest fact- but if the option is to cry about it and waste away or to dust yourself off and show life where to shove it, I personally would take the latter- and I hope my students do, too.

8 Bizarre Baby Behaviors

I feel like babies are known for doing weird things (if Youtube videos are any indication), and my son, Rayden, is certainly no exception. This week I'm sharing some of these odd behaviors, and hopefully he's not the only 8-month-old doing these things...

1. He takes off his sunglasses within seconds of my placing them on his head; he immediately puts them in his mouth and chews on them thoughtfully.

2. While gnawing on those sunglasses during walks, he also kicks up his feet onto the cupholders of his stroller and leans back to enjoy the ride with a bottle of milk. Livin' the easy life.

3. He prefers walking to crawling. The problem is, he can't walk on his own, obviously, so he will fuss until we hold his arms, help him stand, and "walk" him around (then, of course, he is all smiles!). Also, instead of getting up on two knees and two hands to crawl, he will occasionally lift himself into the "downward dog" position and make frustrated noises before collapsing. He will sometimes balance himself precariously on one foot and two arms and two feet and one arm for several seconds before slowly, awkwardly, tipping over. Hey, practice makes perfect!

4. He blows loud raspberries. In public places. In church, especially. If your bare arm is available, he will sneak attack it with an especially drool-packed one. Trust me on this.

5. He makes wild expressions and gestures as if he is seriously communicating with you. It's actually really awesome and hilarious.

6. He's teething and will gnaw on practically everything. I offer him teething rings and toys often, but he tends to spit them out and insert the nearest inedible object. Just today, he tried to eat my laptop case, two pillows, his stuffed monkey, his socks, my socks, my new flip-flops, my arm, five different books, his sunglasses, his shirt, his pants, my pants, my laptop, his diaper bag, a ball, the couch, the kitchen table, his car seat, his high chair, and half a dozen other items.

7. Anything that he isn't attempting to eat, he is drooling on. So, yep, that includes basically everything in our entire house, and, yep, that includes myself and my husband. 

8. He has a foot fetish. Seriously, he is obsessed with feet. He grabs his own feet and pulls off his socks so he can admire his toes. He finds it hysterically funny if I move my toes up and down while wearing socks. Add in weird noises, and he will literally fall over laughing. He will also try to munch on the feet of friend, family, and stranger alike, so beware.

There you have it: 8 silly habits of a fascinating little 8-month old. Maybe next month, I'll make a list of 9 fresh items, as he will have no doubt picked up more bizarre behaviors by that time...

How to Stay Sane as a New Mom

Being one of the first in my group of friends and family (this generation of my family, that is) to have a baby, life can be tough at times. I suddenly find myself plagued with responsibility. Not that I've ever been a particularly irresponsible person, but it was nice to know I could take a day off of life if I wanted to. You know, those Saturdays when you really should catch up on work and chores but you just say, "Aw, to heck with it!" and then you sleep in, read an entire book without interruption, play video games with your husband while eating junk food and go wherever the night takes you. Those Saturdays no longer exist for me, and I will mourn them briefly here: wahhhhh. Okay, I'm done.

On a serious note, however, it is tough to accept the responsibility of raising another human being. Maybe it didn't used to be such a life-altering event, but nowadays our society flinches at and shirks off responsibility whenever possible. I think it's why we see so many damaging choices made by many nowadays; people want to do what they want when they want it and not care about the consequences. When you have a little munchkin to protect, though, every changes. It's as though, most of your adult life, you've been looking through one of those kaleidoscope toys and then you suddenly adjust the scope and all of the shapes and colors change. It's not a bad thing; it's just completely different.

One of the strangest changes is that I feel this bizarre hyper-awareness of the many faults of society. Wow, that sounded more intense than I think it is. Honestly, however, when you have a baby, you look at the news through new eyes, questioning, "What's life going to be like for him when he grows up?", "Is the world going to be safe?", "How can I protect him from all the crazy people out there?", "What can I do to help make sure he'll make the right choice in life and not be influenced by all the negativity and creepiness of the world, the media, etc?" Of course, I want my son to think and act for himself, but it can be a difficult concept to wrap my head around at times: a little person that came out of me can actually become his own person. Whoa, trippy. Or maybe I just had too much coffee this morning...


Another weird situation that makes me feel off-kilter is the fact that I'm fairly certain my personality has changed as a result of Rayden's birth. It's not like I'm actually a different person, but it's the kaleidoscope metaphor again (this time, I'm the kaleidoscope; I'm the same being but I switched to a slightly different color frequency). I ventured forth last night and did a little research (gasp!) to go along with my writing because I wanted a solid answer to this question: Can your personality really change when you become a mother?

After riding the pregnancy and post-pregnancy rollar-coaster of emotions for quite a while, it's difficult to remember what's normal. Or, well, as normal as life can be with a brand new, incredibly needy person in it. From delving into the Psychology Today, What to Expect, Baby Centre and Psychological Science websites, as well as a few parenting blogs, I believe that there is enough evidence to show that a few personality traits do indeed evolve for good. Here are a few traits that tend to get kicked to the curb after having a baby: selfish, lazy, impatient, independent, orderly/neat, vain, daring, spontaneous, idealistic. The ones that seem to increase include the following: compassionate/sympathetic, paranoid/protective, easygoing/adaptable, capable and realistic. Some of these may seem obvious; others may be a surprise. Personally, I feel that many of these apply to me.
I suppose it's obvious that your laziness or impatience would quickly evaporate when a tiny person demands your attention both day and night for months. When you're going on 5 hours of sleep a night and trying to work, keep your house in some semblance of order, and constantly cycle through diaper changes, feedings, play time and comforting, it's laughable to think that you were ever once even a bit lazy or selfish, for that matter. Vanity can easily slip away when you're typically covered in drool and baby food, are leaking breastmilk and have no clothing that fits. You become more capable and easygoing as you learn to roll with the punches of each new baby-led adventure. Daring, spontaneous, independent...these exciting traits don't fade entirely but I feel like you become less focused on having adventures and fun and more focused on caring for a little person and ensuring their success and happiness. I've already mentioned in earlier posts about how I can fully understand the "crazy attack mom" syndrome that would likely be filed under "paranoia" for medical purposes. Hey, I accept it. Maybe the toughest one to accept is an exchange of idealism for realism. I like to think I've always been a realist, but then again, I think of times in my life where I just thought, "Wouldn't it be awesome if..?" and I ran with it, without thinking of the outcome. That's how I ended up spending a semester abroad without knowing anyone overseas. It ended up being an awesome experience, but I probably would've chickened out if I thought it through and contemplated facts like affordability, being able to complete my coursework on time, the scare level of not knowing anyone within a 3,000+ mile radius, etc. I think trading in idealism for realism is bound to happen when you're suddenly faced with a lot of very real stressors and issues. Gone are the days of dreaming about what could be; you have to kick yourself into gear and do what needs to be done to raise your family and keep things going. Again, it's not a bad shift; it's just different.

So, there you go. I'm staying relatively sane and having fun watching Rayden grow and learn something new everyday. It's a paradox of wild, incredible insights/adventures and mellow (okay, sometimes outright boring) repetition but it's an experience that I honestly wouldn't trade for all of the lazy Saturdays in the world.

Baby Swim Joys and Fails

 Ray began baby swim classes two weeks ago. This past month, after literally a lifetime of disliking baths, he has finally started to show interest in water, splashing and smiling at bath time. I figured that it would be an excellent opportunity to begin classes at the YMCA.

Now, I'm a recent first-time YMCA member. I always felt a little nervous about joining the Y, convinced that everyone else there would be way more athletic and fitness-obsessed than I am. This winter, they had a promotion around New Year's that included a really affordable first month and waived all of the joining fees, so I finally made the leap to join the club. Then, I heard about the baby swim lessons, an awesome way for Rayden to get out and make friends while having fun! The Y would be a great place for him, as well!

For the most part, the little guy has loved the water during his first two lessons! The other kiddos range in age from 6 months up to 2 years, so the variety in their motor skills is fairly extraordinary. Ray is at the younger end of the spectrum, of course, but he likes splashing, watching the other kids, and trying to move himself through the water. He has been very independent lately (these days, he struggles against anyone who tries to cuddle him if he doesn't want it; he also tries to feed himself and moves himself by inch-worming his way around the floor in a desperate attempt at crawling, which is hilarious to see!). Naturally, he loves the sensation of propelling himself through the pool. We sing songs in class, too, and he loves the singing and tries to join in with his own unique noises. Unfortunately, though, for all of the awesomeness that is swim lessons, we newcomers manage to fail from time to time.

Fail #1: Swim Diapers. No, don't worry, I didn't forget the swim diapers! However, I didn't realize that every other infant and toddler in class would be equipped with his or her own adorable little swimsuit on top of said swim diaper. I had no idea they even made suits that small! And Rayden, with his incredibly impressive bowels, managed to poop before the lesson finished. The diaper kept it all in, thank God, but apparently, you can see right through those wet swim diapers and I was getting the stink eye from one of the other moms. Oops! Since we didn't have a spare swim diaper, and it apparently wasn't bothering him, I just let the little guy continue to play and splash for a bit longer before heading out. Plus, you know, the chlorine was working its magic, I'm sure. I figured, no harm done :) It got me to thinking that maybe that was why the others wore their mini swimsuits; what you don't know (or can't see) can't hurt you! 

Fail #2: Swim Trunks. After the diaper incident, I figured that we should invest in a pair of miniature boys swim trunks for the little dude. We shopped around a bit to no avail. Finally, I saw that Shopko was having an epic summer baby sale, so we found him a little Mickey swim suit for 1/2 off. Of course, the smallest size they had was 12months, so the shorts slide down his little butt just a bit and reach nearly to his feet. (Where the heck are these other mothers finding a smaller size suit?) Still, the little guy wore the shorts and we were feeling fairly successful all around for the second class. Much to our surprise, one of the other moms had her little man clad only in a diaper this time! She smiled at us, and we decided that maybe the other mothers at the Y aren't too hoity-toity after all.

Fail #3: Cold Water. Can't do anything about this one. The pool was super cold during our second class since they'd turned the temperature down for a swim meet the evening before. As a result, when the instructor suggested we just dunk our little ones into the water for the "Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall" game she likes to start with, Ray did not appreciate the burst of cold water on his tiny body (and I only dipped him in up to the waist!). As my son burst into his screaming wails, the other kids all played about as if the water wasn't 40 degrees. (Okay, so I exaggerate. It wasn't that cold, but the little man's skin is sensitive.) We quickly made our way out of the pool and bundled up, only to cower on the steps and watch the lesson while we gradually made our way bit-by-bit back into the water. He tolerated this more gradual approach but burst into tears again near the end, making him the only baby to date to cry in his class (much less twice in one 30-minute period). Awesome.

Well, there you have it. Swimming has certainly had its ups and downs so far, but I hope he comes to love the lessons. I remember enjoying swim lessons as a kid at the local high school pool; it was so much fun learning to dive and mastering the strokes (I use the word "mastering" lightly here; there are legitimate swim pros in my family, but I am certainly not one of them!). By summertime, the little guy's swim trunks will likely fit a bit better and he'll be ready to explore the real water as we move up to Lake Superior! Just kidding! I don't think that big freezer of a lake is appropriate for an infant, but there are many lakes and pools to be explored in WI and Northern MI, and we are bound to have a fun and adventurous summer. Bring on the sunshine and warm(er) water!

Writing for Writing's Sake

Since my last post was about the perils of the publishing world, I've decided to make this one about my reasons for writing that are not related to publishing.

As some of you may know, I've been writing stories since I could hold a pen...or, at least, pretty darn close to it. I remember one of my earliest stories was about my younger sisters being chased by a vacuum. (Sorry, ladies!) I also recall a story about a girl who wants a world without rules and finds herself trapped aboard a lawless pirate ship until she confesses that she does indeed need law and order in her life. It certainly wasn't Pulitzer Prize-worthy, but, as I look back on that tale now, it seems like it has the potential for more than a middle school writing assignment...however, I really should finish the novels I'm already working on first!

If I had to label it, I would say that the greatest joy of writing is the ability to bring other worlds to life. One of my students told me the other day that she loves reading because "you can have an adventure anywhere!" I told her that this element carries over into the writing realm, as well. Any time you desire, you can visit real or imagined lands; you can also transform into anyone you like, temporary though it may be. This probably makes me sound ridiculous, but it is beautiful in a way, too
: to be able to travel to another life or universe without leaving the security of your own little slice of the world. (Insert inspirational image...or three.)

For me, the main blessing of writing is that it has always helped me to organize my thoughts. As a kid, I was hopelessly shy. My middle school teachers are shocked today when they learn that I stood in front of a classroom of high school kids for two years. Part of the reason that I wasn't very outgoing and quick to talk was because the words always seemed to come out wrong. In front of family and close friends, I was just fine. However, if caught off guard or in front of an audience (however small), a jumble of word vomit would shoot out of my mouth and I would then panic, making it even worse until I sounded completely incoherent. This situation kept me from raising my hand in class, participating in games and sports where you had to call out across a field or court, and attracting too much attention in any situation. Being able to write down my thoughts and feelings made the world a much better place. I think the first time I realized that by organizing and writing my thoughts I could do just about anything was when I was selected to give the salutatorian speech at my 8th grade graduation. I reordered those words until they were perfect and memorized them until I could say them with my eyes closed (even though I would clutch my notes desperately when standing in front of hundreds of my peers' closest family and friends on the big day). That was just the starting point, but I became more brave and willing to improvise as the years went on. Now, I'm to the point where I'm no longer frazzled by those awkward "get to know each other" games in small group settings and I'll even seek conversation with strangers in supermarkets or long lines. I feel that my words are my own now, and I control them in my conversations as well as in my novels. In both situations, anything is possible.

Coming from that experience, I feel almost a physical pain when my students tell me that they hate writing. I think to myself, How can you possibly hate imagination and thought? Because that is basically what writing is. Sometimes I tell them this, and they brush me off. Other times they give me excuses, such as fears that their spelling sucks or that their grammar is goofy. Those excuses don't fly with this English teacher. I tell them to forget about the miniscule details of punctuation, spelling, and vocabulary; for now, just write! It's amazing what your average middle school or high school student is capable of when they let these fears go. I mean, just think of how fearless teenagers are in a typical situation. (I don't know about you, but I jumped off a railroad trestle over a lake as a teen; we tend to do stupid stuff at that time in our lives.) I tell my students to focus on emotion and content first; you can always go back and revise the crap out of what you write. I know I do that with everything from story-writing to emails for my students' parents. Worse case scenario, someone else can help you perfect it. Now, this writing inspiration certainly doesn't work for everyone, but it can be an uplifting experience. An element as simple as a pen to paper (or, more often nowadays, finger to keyboard) is capable of not just organizing thoughts and changing the life of a shy little girl, it holds the possibility for the creation of alternate experiences and realities that truly are endless.

They published that?

If you're a writer, or maybe just an avid reader, you probably ask yourself the same question from time to time: "Why did they publish that?" Navigating the complicated labyrinth of the publishing world is difficult, and there is a myriad of literature competing with one another for the attention of the "big" publishers in New York. (Of course, there's also indie publishing and self-publishing available, but those involve their own challenges.) Still, sometimes I find myself halfway through a novel that somehow passed the critical eyes of the "Big Six" in NYC yet leaves me pondering, "What the heck?"

"How does this happen?" you may ask. First, let's play a game! Guess which of the following lines is from a published novel that went on to sell millions of copies:
A. "Up ahead they's a thousan' lives we might live, but when it comes it'll on'y be one."
B. "Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."
C. "His fingers were ice-cold, like he'd been holding them in a snowdrift before class."
D. "His voice is warm and husky, like dark melted chocolate fudge caramel...or something."


If you guessed "all of the above", you are correct! A is from The Grapes of Wrath; don't feel bad if you didn't recognize it, but Steinbeck's Depression-era novels are still frequently taught in schools (hence my teacher-ish choice). B is a relatively famous line from the Harry Potter series, which I'm willing to say is basically a classic as well by now...

Moving on...do the last two seem rather un-literary? If you said, "Hey, I'm not an amazing writer, but I could come up with better similes than those if you woke me out of bed at 2am after a rather celebratory evening", I would say that you're probably right. Still, this stuff sells millions. Somehow. C is from Twilight and D is from Fifty Shades of Gray. Both have even made it to the big screen.

Now, I'm not going to say that you shouldn't read those two books or that you're "not cool" if you liked them, but I will say that I wish there was a greater appreciation for quality literary fiction, both in the publishing realm and throughout the world at large. It depresses me when I see novel after novel of spine-less female characters surrounded by awkwardly-forced metaphors. These two books just happen to be the most popular examples that fit this common occurrence. Still, a part of me knows why it happens. After attending a few writing webinars and conferences, I've learned that most publishing success boils down to marketing. Publishers pick up what makes them the big bucks, and sometimes you might be amazed at what sells. I am probably a bit of a literary snob (though I try not to be; I'll read anything once!) so I sometimes feel annoyed when bad work is picked up and (worse!) sells millions of copies. You might say, "Sarah, how can it be so 'bad' if it sells millions?" Color me confused because I haven't a clue beyond the fact that those authors have great marketing techniques and publishers willing to put in the time to make sure that particular book is in your face everywhere you go. Their popularity spreads like a disease.

I have to admit, I fell for the Twilight craze back in the day (if you haven't read it, don't; if you have, check out the lovely parody entitled Nightlight- much more entertaining than the original), and though I felt unsatisfied with the main character's complete lack of personality and the cheesy writing, there was something very intriguing about the underlying plot of the story- I just wish someone else had scooped up the idea and written it better first! I can happily say that I haven't fallen for the 50 Shades craze, though if the rumors are true, this one is equally poorly written. Honestly, if I really want to hear some awkward metaphors for genitalia, I can just go back to teaching at the public high school. 

Before I sign off, I'll give you something to consider. Next time you hear of the next big "hit" book, don't be so quick to soak up the media's praise and pick it off the shelf. You, my reader friends, deserve much better than teenaged vampire love trysts and BDSM. Give the fad a little time and consider instead reading something with a positive message or a moral theme behind it. No, it doesn't have to be dull and dry; there are so many well-written, compelling novels out there that aren't million-copy sellers! Read something your awesome reader, librarian or teacher friends recommend. I know several other writers (a fortunate few are even published) who would be happy to point you in the direction of some quality reading material. Personally, I am a big fan of stories with a "rise of the underdog" theme and quirky kick-ass female leads, and both can be found in my own novels. I feel that, if I'm going to become a published writer, I should be creating characters and stories that deserve to be heard, not ones that bring people down. Even if I don't sell a million copies, I can be at peace with myself and be content that it's something I can share with my son in the future.